01.11.2011
First Wikileaks UFO “Revelation” Not So Revealing
Categories: Features

Anyone who even slightly believes there may be more life in the universe than just planet Earth perked their ears slightly when Wikileak’s founder Julian Assange said in an interview with the Guardian “it is worth noting that in yet-to-be-published parts of the cablegate archive there are indeed references to UFOs.” More speculative parts of the internet believed that the Cablegate archives could contain the smoking gun in a UFO coverup. The New Zealand Defense Force even got a little spooked and released thousands of files on reported UFO sightings.

Unfortunately, the first UFO Wikileak fell short of anything remotely interesting or even unknown. In a 2007 diplomatic cable from Minsk, an official is asked why his department no longer “investigates paranormal phenomena.” He responds: “Unlike during the USSR, the department is not engaged in studying paranormal phenomena. [Back then], we had greater means and opportunities which we could spend on anything and everything. Today the situation is different. Then, when society was excited by something, it entered our sphere of interest. But when it comes to healers, UFOs and such, we just can’t deal with them any more.” In other words, the biggest revelation so far on UFOs and other paranormal activity is that the Russians ran out of money to spend on hunting Aliens sometime after the Cold War.

While plenty more documents that reference UFO’s probably exist in the Cablegate archives, it’s more than likely they’re about as big a let down as when Geraldo opened Al Capone’s vault. Still, it’s well known governments fired wads of cash to study all different sorts of “paranormal phenomena.” The U.S. spent untold amounts on Project Blue Book. Americans still have no idea what goes on in any number of secret or so-secret-they-technically-don’t-exist facilities-around-the-globe. Even Julius Levinson knew the Pentagon didn’t spend thousands of dollars on a toilet seat. It’s more likely the real secrets will still stay buried for quite some time, since Proxima Centauri has no embassies. Yet, anyway.